Shiny, Shiny Christmas

I know some of you longtime blog readers have probably been chomping at the bit to discover what My Man got me for Christmas. OK, so maybe not. Maybe I'm the only one who has slowly been going insane with his constant teasing hints and flat out lies ("Gee, I hope your gift will be able to fit through our front door"). As you regulars are well aware, My Man is a most excellent gift giver. How excellent? He needs no prompting. No constant subtle (and not so subtle) hints on what my little heart desires. No need for me to make out a list. He does it all on his own, and he has yet, in our almost 11 years together, get me a dud gift. The guy is that good.

This year's gift was late. Namely because he ordered it from New York and I went home for the holidays. Well, said gift arrived yesterday afternoon. What we have here is a tanzanite and diamond ring. AKA The Nicest Piece Of Jewelry I'm Likely Ever To Own. Ever. What I particularly love about it is the way the tanzanite catches the light. Sometimes it looks purple, other times blue, it's not a "flat" gemstone by any stretch of the imagination.

Plus it's sooooo pretty! Flash some shiny in my face and I'm as helpless as the next girl.

So there it is folks. Christmas at the Bat Cave. I don't wear a ton of jewelry, but I'm currently toying with the idea of having this bad boy permanently attached to my finger.

The Month That Was December 2008

I am planning several posts that will dissect my reading habits during 2008, but for now here's what I managed to get done in December. I wish I could say I ended 2008 on a high note, but alas, I only managed to get five books read. Two of which were short stories from Harlequin. I'm not sure they "count" as "books," but hey, I'm desperate. Not to mention sad that I've been such a reading slug this year.

What A Scoundrel Wants by Carrie Lofty, Medieval England, Grade = B+, Full Review.

• A well-written book featuring "different" character-types that took me forever to get through. I found the first half a bit of a slog, given that the characters didn't trust each other and were so morally flexible they would have sold their own mothers if the opportunity presented itself. The second half worked a lot better for me, mostly because trust starts to make an appearance and the characters stop fighting each other and their feelings.
  

Her Montana Man by Cheryl St. John, Western (Montana), Harlequin Historical, Grade = B, TGTBTU Review.

• I've read better by St. John, but this was a good, solid western. I've got a weakness for romance heroes who have long-standing "crushes" on the heroine before they hook up, and this guy is tough-guy-strong with a gooey-marshmallow-interior. Loved him! The heroine was pretty good too, although I do think she could have confided in the hero much, much sooner.
  

Notorious Lord, Compromised Miss by Annie Burrows, Regency England, Harlequin Historical Undone, Grade = C+, TGTBTU Review.

• I've quickly become addicted to these Undone eBook short stories. Hero and heroine, neither anxious to marry, become friends and fall in love. Lots of nice dialogue and I enjoyed the banter between hero and heroine. I did feel the writing was a little abrupt, which is why I didn't grade this one higher.
  

High Seas Stowaway by Amanda McCabe, 16th Century Caribbean, Harlequin Historical, Grade C+, TGTBTU Review.

• I picked up this one because I enjoyed an earlier HH Undone story by McCabe, and because of the setting. I generally enjoyed it, although I found the heroine's motivations unclear and therefore she came off a little too "wishy-washy" for my tastes. Nice hero, fantastically lush setting, and a sea-faring romance. A good bet for those of you desiring a historical that doesn't take place in the U.S. or England.
  

Layover by Megan Hart, Contemporary Erotic Romance, Spice Briefs, Grade B+, TGTBTU Review.

• This spicy eBook short story hit the spot! Hot, sexy and featuring a heroine who "takes charge" without going into full-blown dominatrix mode (not that there's anything wrong with that). I liked the "happily for now" ending and felt it fit the story - but if you're a reader who demands a wedding ring and a pregnant heroine knocked up with triplets at the end, it's probably not for you.
  

Planes, Trains & Automobiles

Saturday Afternoon Around 4PM. Local Podunk Airport In Michigan. Seriously, they've got like 4 gates. Po-dunk.

American Airlines Chick: Your flight to O'Hare has been canceled. We have a shuttle van leaving at 5:30PM.

Me: I won't make my connecting flight to LAX.

AAC: Let me see what we have flying out tomorrow.

Super Librarian muses, waiting until tomorrow will only make matters worse given the reports of numerous passengers already stranded at O'Hare thanks to Friday night's pea soup fog.

Me: Hey, what about surrounding airports?

AAC: There's a United flight leaving for Orange County at 8:05PM.

Me: I'll take it.

5:30PM, On The Shuttle Van to O'Hare.

Super Librarian kicks herself for not having a book light for Sony Reader. Her Man asked her if she wanted one and she stupidly said no. "I don't read in bed anymore and when I fly, there's a reading light on the plane." Super Librarian did not take into account shuttle vans.

6:45PM, O'Hare Airport.

Hordes of people, but Super Librarian gets checked in. Um, no seat assignment on boarding pass. United Airlines Chick who takes her suitcase tells her to ask the attendant at the gate.

7:00PM, O'Hare Airport Security.

Oh joy. Super Librarian has been pulled out of the line to get searched. She must look like a particularly menacing Super Librarian. Still, even getting patted-down by female TSA officer (settle down boys, she's wasn't all that cute) she makes it through O'Hare security faster than LAX's a week before. Super Librarian says "thank you" and is nice to all the security people because she is sure they've had people screaming in their faces all day.

7:10PM, At The Gate Waiting In Line.

Harried United Gate Dude: You don't have a seat assignment because American Airlines booked you on an overbooked flight. Take a seat, and I'll call your name.

Super Librarian calls Mom. Mom now officially worried her precious daughter will be sleeping on bench at O'Hare over night. Calls Her Man. Prays to various gods.

7:45PM, At The Gate.

HUGD: Passenger Super Librarian to the podium please.

Super Librarian does happy dance! We have a seat assignment! Weeeeee!

8:05PM, Boarding The Plane.

Super Librarian continues to do happy dance! Exit row seat! Glorious leg room! Sweet, glorious leg room!

9PM, On The Plane.

Super Librarian freezing ta-tas off because plane is really bloody cold! Puts on winter coat, zips it up, pulls the hood up and digs out her gloves. Can't read, too cold. Super Librarian looks like a jackass, but she doesn't care. She's cold! Freezing! She contemplates starting a fire in the cabin using cheap airline pillows and in flight magazines. Hypothermia sets in and makes her sleepy. Takes a nap.

10:30PM, Orange County Airport.

Super Librarian calls Mom. Mom can now stop worrying. Super Librarian calls Her Man. Come get me! Gets luggage, Her Man arrives. Takes pity on wilted Super Librarian and hits Taco Bell drive-thru. Couldn't get food at O'Hare because had to wait at gate for seat assignment.

Home sweet home.

Wave Your Hands In The Air Like You Just Don't Care

For the last several years my sisters and I have made it a tradition to have a Girls' Night Out when we're all home at once. Which typically means Christmas-time. We also take turns paying. Last year it was my turn. This year Lil' Sis was picking up the tab.

After a fabulous steak dinner, we hit a new bar downtown to throw back a few. Which meant Sissy Martinis for yours truly. Let me just say, I'm so eternally happy that I didn't know what an Appletini was back when I was in college. Good Lord! Could I have gotten into a lot of trouble with those. My advice? Definitely the sort of cocktail that you could easily make yourself sick on. I had two. Only two. I wanted about 50 of them, but since I have to fly back to Cali this evening, the idea of being hungover for three days straight held zero appeal.

For the last drink of the evening I had something called a Turtletini. This happy little fellow is basically a Chocolate Martini, with chocolate and caramel sauce drizzled in the glass and....

wait for it....

Crushed pecans around the glass rim.

Oh. My. God.

It's got to be illegal in at least 20 states. I couldn't knock these bad boys back all night, but as a "finishing drink?" Sublime. And no, I don't care that it was most likely drinking the equivalent of 5000 calories.

The weather has gone from Cold As Hell to Wacky As Hell. After arriving in Michigan to mammoth amounts of snow and 10 degree temperatures, I'm leaving the state with rain, melting snow, 50 degree temperatures and fog. This fog is supposedly going to clear up. If it doesn't? Yeah, my flights are going nowhere. Fingers crossed!

Festive Gnome Parts

A joyous and Merry Christmas to all of you out in Blog Land. In honor of the season, and in celebration that 95% of the craziness is now done, I've dug up one of my favorite holiday TV clips. In this episode of Murphy Brown, Murphy and the gang had decided to not buy gifts for people this year and instead donate money to charity. Naturally, mayhem ensues.

Happy Holidays everybody!

Today's Weather Brought To You By Books!

I know, I've been a terrible blogger. Partly because I'm visiting family, and trying not to freeze to death in the process, partly because I got nothing. Blogging inspiration seems to have taken it's own Christmas break.

But I do have something today! I was watching the Today Show over breakfast when The Voiceover Guy informed my that "today's weather is brought to you by Putnam, publishers of Scarpetta, the new book by NY Times bestselling author Patricia Cornwell." (or something to that effect).

Sure enough, after Weather Guy was done, and they went to break, there was a commercial for Scarpetta. Now, I've seen TV commercials for books before. Most notably bestselling hot shots like John Grisham and J.D. Robb. What I'm wondering is if with the current state of the economy and publishing in general if we're going to see more of these? Will publishers be buying more air time to pimp the latest books by James Patterson? Mary Higgins Clark? Stephen King? Nicholas Sparks?

I don't think that publishers are going to be shelling out money for commercials for their midlist or debut authors - but for authors who have already "proven" themselves by landing on bestseller lists? Yeah, I'm thinking they might. If only in the hopes of driving up sales numbers. But time will tell.

In the meantime, here's an extended cut of Cornwell's commercial.

Welcome To Michigan

That's the snow currently on my parent's patio. What this picture doesn't show is the bitter, cold wind that is currently blowing this snow all over the damn place. It's a balmy 12 degrees minus whatever the heck the "wind chill" is right now.

I'm cold.

Wait - let's rephrase that.

I'm really flippin' cold.

But I survived Chicago O'Hare and I'm Super Librarian! I laugh in the face of you 12 degrees! You are no match for me and my Super-ness! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Help me. ::whimper::

It's All About The Books

Today is the day before I leave for the Family Christmas Extravaganza back home in Michigan. This means several things. One, I'm currently cleaning and doing laundry. Two, I have to hit the grocery store for My Man (Who is staying behind in CA. Yeah, I know - it sucks, but that's just the way it had to be this year). Three, I've got my Sony Reader ready to roll!

This marks the first trip I've taken with my Sony Reader, and let me tell you how excited I am to not have to bring a carry-on bag loaded down with books! Yippee! Besides my $5.99 copy of Scarpetta, I thought it would be fun to share some of the other goodies I currently have loaded and ready for my reading enjoyment while I'm stuck in various airports.


Pictures Of Us by Amy Garvey, Harlequin SuperRomance. I bought this one out of curiosity. Garvey has written several light, fluffy contemporaries for Brava. The HSR line? Not light and fluffy. For the most part HSR stories are more issue and family oriented. I've enjoyed a couple of her Brava titles, and frankly I'm intrigued by this one if only to see if she can pull off a different "tone."






The Viscount Claims His Bride by Bronwyn Scott, Harlequin Historical. OK, if you've been reading this blog for any stretch of time you've probably figured out I'm a massive ho for HH books. This book is connected to the author's recent Harlequin Historical Undone story, which I read and enjoyed, so I thought I'd try it.







A Man She Couldn't Forget by Kathryn Shay, Harlequin SuperRomance. I almost didn't buy this one. Why? It features an amnesia plot and has the love triangle stink on it. Wendy doesn't do amnesia plots and Wendy really hates love triangles. Sigh, but it's Kathryn Shay. I have loved many of her HSR titles. So for her, I'll try a book with an amnesia plot and the love triangle stink.







High Seas Stowaway by Amanda McCabe, Harlequin Historical. Another book I bought because of an HH Undone story. Again, it's loosely connected to an Undone title I read and enjoyed. Also, this one takes place in the Caribbean, and the different setting intrigues me.








Die Before I Wake by Laurie Breton. I read a very positive review for this recently in Publisher's Weekly and it intrigued me. It's one of those Woman Marries Man After Whirlwind Courtship And Finds Out His First Wife Died Under Mysterious Circumstances books. I wanted to bring a suspense novel along in the event I get tired of reading too much lovey-dovey stuff. This one fit the bill.





As for blogging while I'm away? I probably won't be as prolific as I've been of late, but I should be able to pop in now and again.

This Is Not My Fault

As stated on this blog many times before, I cut my teeth on mystery/suspense novels. As all consuming as my romance reading addiction is - mystery novels are my first love. They just are. Doesn't matter on the type either. Cutesy cozies featuring clever cats, or gory blood-practically-dripping-off-the-pages serial killers. I'll read 'em all.

This will date me, but oh well. Patricia Cornwell was recommended by my Older Sister's Mother-In-Law. At the time, Older Sis did not read suspense novels (she does now however). So she passed on the nugget to me that "MIL said The Body Farm by Patricia Cornwell was really good."

So as a teenager, I read it, loved it, and devoured the other books in the series (for the record, The Body Farm is in the middle of the series).

But over the years, the series has suffered. The author started straying from her trademarks (the cool forensic "stuff" and the grisly crimes) to focus on her characters, much to their detriment. Didn't stop me from reading though. I blame the fact that I started on this series as a teen, and damn me, I'm nothing if not painfully nostalgic. Still, Trace was the last one I bought. Predator was the first book I "checked out from work." And I was lucky enough to get my hands on an ARC of The Book Of The Dead. So I was hoping for an ARC of the new book, Scarpetta to show up at the office as well. No such luck. So on the waiting list I went for a library copy.

Then I got an e-mail offer from Sony. Damn their eyes, it was a 50% off coupon for one ebook. A little voice chirpped in my brain, "Gee, I wonder how much they're selling Scarpetta for?"

$11.99

That would mean with my coupon, I'd be paying $5.99 for an electronic version of a hard cover print release.

Nevermind that I can barely recall the last Cornwell book I flat out enjoyed. It's only $5.99!!!!

So I bought the damn thing. I'm currently justifying it to myself by reasoning that a work copy is currently on the way to me, and I'm leaving for my Family Christmas Extravaganza on Saturday. I really only want to take my loaded Sony Reader with me, and not have to haul a hard cover book around while I'm navigating Airport Hell.

This jusification is almost working. I still feel like a drunk who just fell off the wagon though.

Dubious Reputations

I met Carrie Lofty at RWA in San Francisco. Don't ask me now what we chatted about, but I guarantee it wasn't about her book. Odd, I know. It wasn't until after I returned home from the trip, and Carrie gave my business card a test drive, that I learned her debut historical romance, What A Scoundrel Wants, features Will Scarlet (yes, the Will Scarlet from Robin Hood fame) as the hero. Naturally, I had to read it.

Will Scarlet is fed up with living in the shadow of his famous uncle. With Robin away at war, Will has left Loxley Manor (and Maid Marian) for the promised riches that await him working for the new Sheriff of Nottingham. However, while on a mission for the Sheriff, Will witnesses treason. A nobleman is dead, and it doesn't take long for Will to realize that he was assigned to the mission to play the role of patsy.

Before his confused brain can compute all of this though, he hears a woman's screams. Chivalry kicks in and Will saves her life. OK, so it might have crossed his mind that this woman is a witness and can testify that Will is not a traitor and did not kill a nobleman. Needless to say, his good humor vanishes when he realizes the woman he rescued is blind.

Seriously, it just ain't his day.

Meg of Keyworth lost her sight to illness years ago, and is on a mission to save her sister, Ada. A skilled alchemist, Meg's relationship with Ada is rocky at best. Still, Meg feels guilt over her sister's capture by the vile Sheriff of Nottingham, and was enlisting the aid of a local nobleman when a fight ensued and her champion ended up murdered. Now she's in the company of this Will Scarlet character, whose sole mission seems to be to irritate the hell out of her.

So imagine how happy Meg is when she finds out Will was the one who arrested her dear sister Ada and turned her over the Sheriff.

Oh yeah, she is so not thrilled.

This is a vexing story - mostly because it's biggest asset is also it's biggest hindrance. Both Will and Meg are "morally flexible." They'll plot, lie and cheat, all with a smile on their face and a twinkle in their eye. They're both connivers by trade, and it takes most of the first half for them to figure out how to trust each other, work together, and formulate some sort of strategy.

That doesn't rule out sex though. Lordy be, the chemistry these two have is enough to singe your eyebrows.

I'll be honest, I started out loving the banter and interaction only to become weary after a while. There's just so much plotting. And lying. And conniving. It plain wore me out.

But then there is a shift. At about the halfway point, Meg finds herself hung out to dry, Will comes charging to the rescue, and these two begin to admit their feelings. Well, Will does. It takes Meg a bit more time - she's a girl with an incredible amount of baggage, partly from her blindness, partly from her family relations. In that respect her and Will have much in common. Both straining under family obligation and expectations.

Because of this, and the added emotion Lofty infuses into the story, the second half moved by at an extremely fast clip for me. Not only are her characters dealing with the external conflict created by the Sheriff, but they also have to finally address the inner turmoil they've been living with. I was in heaven.

This really is a fascinating debut novel. Granted, I haven't read every historical currently on sale, but I'm fairly confident in saying that nothing you'll find on the shelves at your local Borders is anything like What A Scoundrel Wants. It's gritty, romantic, charming, with a bad boy hero that will make any romance reader worth her salt swoon (seriously, I did - and I don't swoon).

"Had I been dead and cold, your lips on my chest would have brought me back to life."

Oh. My. God. Yeah yeah, I'm a sucker for this kind of stuff. So sue me. ::swoon::

If you're one of those historical romance readers who whine bemoan the lack of originality in the sub genre these days? Yeah, run out and buy this book. And even if I'm wrong and you hate it? It's part of Zebra's debut program and it only costs $3.99. Seriously, y'all should run out and buy it on principle alone.

Final Grade = B+

What's next for Lofty? Ada's story - and whoa doggie, I cannot wait to get my hands on that one! Trust me when I say girlfriend has her work cut out for her on that story, because Ada is a handful. Scoundrel's Kiss is set for a 2009 release.

She's Still A Rock Star

I love it when blog readers e-mail me blog fodder. It makes coming up with posts that much easier!

Anyway, this latest bit of librarian awesomeness comes from regular blog visitor Jenifer by way of my home state of Michigan.

Ann Arbor District Library director Josie Parker may have a pleasant Southern accent and good manners, but don't question her toughness. On Sunday, Parker pursued a thief after he grabbed a collection box of money donated for a local charity called the Family Book Club. In the process, she broke her leg and the thief got away - but not with any money.

Go on with your bad self Josie!

The full article can be found here, although it might be best to ignore the more troll-like comments that suggest Josie chasing after the "desperate" thief wasn't the smartest thing to do. OK, probably not. But two things to consider here:

1) Adrenaline

2) The principle of the matter

Stealing from a library is right up there with stealing from a church or taking candy from a baby.

So yeah, I stand by my "go on with your bad self!"

Steaming Pile Of Christmas Ick

Last year one of my Christmas presents from my parents was a Word Origin desk calender. Every day you rip off a new page, and it gives you a new word, along with the origin of said word. I tend to neglect this calender, so I often find myself ripping off several days because I'm about a week behind. Just in time for the holidays, this is what awaited me on the Sat/Sun December 6/7 entry.

Mistletoe. In modern German, Mist means "animal excrement." The ancient Germanic formation misteltan means something like "a twig that causes animals to excrete," the belief apparently being the parasitic plant's berries gave the birds that ate them loose bowels.

Gee, now it makes perfect sense why we hang this stuff up in doorways so we can go around kissing each other. Ahhhh, romance!

There's No I In Team

13 Sports Terms That Sound Kinda Dirty
My Man and I watch an obscene amount of sports, and we both have the sense of humor of 12 year old boys. These are sports terms or things we've heard announcers say over the years that struck us as "kinda naughty." Enjoy!

1) He Could Go All The Way! American football. Basically when a guy catches the ball and runs a long ass way to the end zone for a touchdown. Dirty comment: I certainly hope so, otherwise I'll be really disappointed.

2) Tight End. Honorable mention? Hall Of Fame Tight End. American football. An offensive position player. Dirty comment: Mmmmmm, tight ends.....

3) Good wood. Baseball. When a player solidly hits the ball he got "good wood." Dirty comment: I certainly hope so, otherwise I'll be really disappointed.

4) Ball handling skills. Basketball. Refers to dribbling, passing, basically how well the player handles the basketball. Dirty comment: Well, basketball players do have big hands....

5) Illegal touching. A penalty in American football. Not just anyone can catch the football. For example, the only time an offensive lineman can catch the ball is when he declares himself as an "eligible receiver" or the ball is first touched/tipped by a defensive player. Dirty comment: Isn't Roman Polanski still a fugitive because of this?

6) Driving to the hole. Basketball. Basically a guy charging to the basket to make a shot. Dirty comment: Geez, hopefully the guy doesn't get lost because you know he won't stop and ask for directions.

7) Squeeze Play. Baseball. Runner standing on third base and the batter sacrifice bunts. The idea is that the batter will get thrown out at first, while the guy on third runs home to score. Dirty comment: Ouch!

8) Pick and roll. Basketball. An offensive play in which a player stops to block a defender for a teammate handling the ball and then slips behind the defender to accept a pass. Dirty comment: Friday night at your favorite seedy bar.

9) Deep ball. Baseball. Home run. Dirty comment: Well it sounds like fun in theory, but it might hurt....

10) Long ball. Baseball. Home run. And often used in the sentence "Chicks dig the long ball." For the record? Yeah, we do. Dirty comment: Guys, when your doctor tells you to turn your head and cough, pray you don't turn around to find him looking confused.

11) Winners always want the ball in their hands at the end. Basketball. Super star or "clutch" players who make the game winning shot. Think Michael Jordan in pretty much every playoff game he was ever in. Dirty comment: Given the amount of groupies that stalk NBA players, I'm sure Michael had plenty of volunteers to help him in this department.

12) Rode him hard to the finish. Horse racing. Self-explanatory. Dirty comment: I'm flushed....I need a cold shower....what was I doing?....oh yeah, need to finish this list.

13) Missed him deep. American Football. Quarterback chucks the ball down the field, only to over-throw his deep receiver (tee hee). Dirty comment: This sounds painful and unfortunate. I'm also pretty sure it would require a trip to the ER.

Making The Rounds

My latest column is up over at Romancing The Blog. Read it, live it, love it!

I added an Amazon widget to the sidebar. No particular reason, just because it amused me.

I'm still continuing to post updates over on my Upcoming Historical Romances wiki. New covers! New titles! Go forth and look at the pretty!

In Wendy Is Trying To Jump Start Her Mojo News, I plowed through Fearless Fourteen by Janet Evanovich on audio book yesterday. First, some back story - I've never "read" Evanovich. She's one of my Audio Only authors. This is why I suspect I'm still happily chugging along with this series. Listening, in my opinion, isn't quite as "taxing" as reading. That being said, even listening to this fluffy bit of brain candy was a bit tiresome.

Basically I listen to Evanovich for two reasons: 1) There's usually at least one laugh out loud moment and 2) Ranger says something that makes me have to change my panties. Fearless Fourteen? Nothing funny. No particularly choice Ranger moments. In fact, the author bypasses genuinely funny for a series of inane zany antics that strained credulity (Stephanie getting attacked by blue dye, everything Grandma Mazur does, everything Lula does (seriously, Lula drives me batshit crazy), a stalker who has psychic revelations about flying pizzas etc. etc. etc.) Granted, nobody reads Evanovich looking for realism - but this was just "wackier" than usual in my opinion.

I don't "do" wacky.

So for those of you who resisted the siren call of buying this in hard cover? Yeah, good for you. Because I can so not see paying $27.95 retail for this. Heck, I'd have a hard time forking over $7.99 for the paperback. Go to the library. The waiting lists should be starting to wind down now. Trust me, you can wait for it. Final word on the matter? Blah. Final Grade = C-

In Case You Were Wondering

How I spent my weekend:

1) Christmas shopping is done.

2) Holiday cards are done and in the mail.

3) Doing enough laundry for a family of six. I swear, every T-shirt we own between the two of us was in my laundry basket.

4) Cleaning two very smelly bathrooms. I deserve combat pay. Just saying.

5) Ironing. Because I was an idiot and did the laundry. Next to scrubbing soap scum out of the bathtub, ironing has got to be my least favorite chore. And damn my Midwestern blood, I'm too cheap frugal to send this stuff out to the dry cleaners to have them do it. It goes against everything I believe in.

6) Trying to convince My Man that watching the dreadfully inept Buffalo Bills just isn't worth the aggravation and heartache. On the bright side, they aren't quite as dreadful or inept as the hapless Detroit Lions. Still, they're painful to watch. We're both currently on the lookout for a nice cushy bandwagon to hop on for the postseason. Who will it be?

7) Not doing any reading. Seriously, none. It is not remotely funny how behind I am. It makes me sad.

Unfrickinbelievable!

I'm not a massive college football fan, but last night was pretty damn exciting. My alma mater, the University at Buffalo (State University of New York) upset previously undefeated and nationally ranked Ball State for the Mid-American Conference championship (MAC).

And we got to watch it all the way out here in California thanks to the wonders of ESPN.

So what does this mean for the Bulls? Well, they get to go to their first ever Bowl game, and word is they've accepted an invitation to the International Bowl up in Toronto. Wave to them KristieJ!

Between getting two college degrees, I lived in Buffalo just under 6 years - and during that entire time I think the football team won about 6 games. So yeah, last night was highly entertaining, and a huge turn-around. Congratulations boys! Woo-frickin'-Hoo!

And So It Begins

Librarians live and die by statistics. Mostly because we have to justify our existence to every politician looking to trim the budget. Also, and this can't be understated enough, librarians are just nosy, curious people by nature. Anything past simple arithmetic makes my head hurt, but I love looking at library usage statistics.

Geek that I am.

Yesterday my employer sent out our monthly statistics from a couple months back (what can I say, we're behind) and my coworker exclaimed that usage was "way up."

Then I took a closer look. Usage is up - in certain areas.

Before my defection to a sterile administration building, I worked at one of our branches located in a decidedly working-class area. People on fixed incomes. Immigrants fairly new to this country. The types of people who traditionally don't have a lot of disposable income. When they do have disposable income? Yeah, they're paying their bills, stocking their pantry, or buying their kids that much needed new pair of shoes. Books? Um, no.

Our branches located in these types of areas? Library usage did not go up. It either went down very slightly, or stayed level. No wild swings one way or another. Why? Because these communities traditionally use public libraries anyway - whether the economy is in the crapper or not. For them it's already a part of their lives.

Side note: Librarians, if you ever need an ego boost, work a public library in an area with a large immigrant population. Americans, God bless us, take public libraries for granted. We just do. But when you explain the institution to someone new to this country? Holy cow. It's like you're giving them the keys to the city. By far the #1 thing I miss about The Old Job.

Now our branches located in more affluent areas? The areas where people have traditionally had disposable income, or a big enough credit line to make their neighbors think they have disposable income? Library usage is up. Way up. In many instances we had branches circulate up to 3000-4000 more items in one month. 30 days people. Why?

Well, as much as people love their books - if it comes down to buying that shiny new hard cover or putting gas in your SUV so you can go to work? Yeah, gas is winning out. Plus, the library is a real bargain. Even if you jack up a 50 cent late fee, that's still way cheaper than what you would have paid for the book at the Big Box Discount Store. Oh sure, you have to sit your happy butt on a waiting list for that hot, new bestseller. But waiting becomes amazingly more palpable to people when they open up their wallets only to discover less money there.

Just saying.

I'm curious to see what the immediate future will bring. Specifically the November and December numbers. My experience has been that around the holidays, library usage takes a swift nose dive - but this year? I wonder. Especially since over 500,000 jobs were lost just in the month of November. How many of those people will find themselves going to public libraries to fill out online job applications and check out books on how to write amazing cover letters and resumes?

It's a mixed blessing for librarians though. As happy as we are to have people coming in and taking advantage of the services we offer? The crappy economy isn't exactly leaving us unscathed. Budgets are tanking. Hours are getting reduced, and in some cases across the country, branches are getting shut down. Thankfully it hasn't come to that for my employer, but that doesn't mean we're all dancing on top of our desks either.

So gird your loins fellow librarians, and prepare for the long bumpy road ahead.

Leaving The Past Behind

Dear Publishers,
As a librarian, many of you tend to send me various catalogs throughout the year. This is much appreciated, and helps me keep on top of upcoming releases. However, while going through a catalog Monday afternoon, my blood pressure spiked. There, nestled in the pages of the St. Martin's Minotaur catalog was information about "a pulse-pounding debut thriller" by an author named Linda Castillo.

Little Miss Crabby Pants then got to wondering, "Could it be the same Linda Castillo? The same Linda Castillo who has written six single title romantic suspense novels for Berkley and twelve series books for Harlequin?"

Yep, it is.

OK, if you want to get technical about it - Sworn To Silence, which is due out in June is the author's first straight-up suspense novel. Still, it galls me to see the word "debut" attached to her name when this is hardly her first rodeo. I understand the predicament. I mean, you wouldn't want suspense/thriller fans to know about her sordid past as a ::gasp:: romance writer because the evil, nasty love cooties might scare them away.

I know it's not "fair" to pick on St. Martin's Minotaur about this. They're hardly the first or last publisher to ever do this. It happens all the time and there is plenty of guilt to lay on numerous doorsteps.

Still, it chaps my buns in a serious way. It implies the romance novels that the author wrote aren't "real books." That the author didn't work just as hard on them as she undoubtedly did on her "exciting debut novel" that is coming out after she's already published 50 "trashy" Harlequins. You can go ahead and accuse Little Miss Crabby Pants of being "over sensitive" - but given the inferiority complex that hangs over the romance genre to this day, it's just better for you to admit now that I'm right and you are wrong.

Sincerely,
Wendy the Super Librarian AKA Little Miss Crabby Pants

P.S. - This is by no means a "knock" against Castillo. I mean, it's not like she has any control over St. Martin's PR department. Seriously, congratulations to her for not only scoring a hard cover release with Minotaur (an imprint I generally like), but also author quotes from the likes of Lisa Scottoline, Sandra Brown, John Hart and Chelsea Cain. And damn, this book sounds wicked good. We tend to get ARCs from Minotaur here at work, and I'll be stalking the mail room for this one.

Description:

Kate Burkholder, who grew up in the Amish community of Painters Mill, Ohio before leaving for the outside world and the study of law enforcement, has recently been appointed Chief of Police in her former hometown. Her knowledge of the Amish, their language and customs, makes her the perfect candidate. When a serial killer, whose spree sixteen years before was dubbed The Slaughterhouse Murders, returns with spectacular violence, Kate is determined to catch him. But she is also desperate to keep a secret from her past: the reason she fled the Amish world is that she was the young girl the killer attacked before disappearing - and she killed him in self defense. No one knows, except her Amish father and brother who helped bury the body. So who is behind the current murders? And what is the connection to Kate's past?

Sharing Is Caring

Like any good little Gen-Xer, I have faithfully watched The Simpsons since it debuted on Fox many moons ago. Despite the fact that I can't remember the last time I laughed out loud at an episode. Seriously, it's been a long ass time. So color me happy when I finally watched Sunday's episode last night (ahhh TiVo, how I love thee) and they poked some much deserved fun at my arch-nemesis Steve Jobs.

Any librarian worth their salt has issues with Jobs. Mostly because it's very apparent that he was absent the day in kindergarten when they learned about "sharing."

Yeah, yeah - Apple computers are the best thing since the steam engine, self-check out machines at the grocery store, and washing machines. I'm an idiot tool too ignorant for my own good. Blah, blah, blah.

Whatever, I still about wet my pants during this scene.

The Month That Was November 2008

Even though I've done zero in preparation for Christmas, I am so insanely happy to see November bite the dust. Between evacuating because of the wild fires and my visiting in-laws gifting us with the Stomach Flu From Hell - let's just say I'm ready for something happy and fun to happen to me.

Although finding out that all my worldly possessions didn't burn up in said wild fire was pretty damn happy. That's something positive to focus on.

Despite all of that, I managed to finish 5 books in November. Not bad, not great, although nothing that really knocked my socks off - which is kind of disappointing.

Turner's Woman by Jenna Kernan, Harlequin Historical western, Grade = C+. I fell insanely, head over heels, in lurve with the heroine of this story. But the hero? Yeah, sped right past Alpha and landed straight in Jackass Idiot Moron Why Doesn't The Heroine Just Shoot Him Already? territory. Full review.

The Borrowed Bride by Elizabeth Lane, Harlequin Historical western, Grade = B-. A very emotional read about a woman who marries her beau's brother after he takes off for Alaska and she discovers she's pregnant. Loved the hero, found the heroine a little bland, but a good solid read. Review at TGTBTU.

A Christmas Wedding by Tracy Wolff, Harlequin SuperRomance, Grade = C-. A marriage-in-trouble story that had me hoping the hero would dump his wife and find a life of his own. Seriously, Did Not Like That Woman. Still, Wolff knows how to write a story, and I had a hard time putting this book down. Will be looking for her next HSR release. Review at TGTBTU.

Broken Wing by Judith James, Historical romance (France, England, various other locales), Grade = C. I had a hard time with the Telling Over Showing writing style, which led to me never fully connecting with the characters. Also, I prefer more fully realized heroines in my romance novels, and this book is All About The Tortured Hero. I did appreciate the Old School Vibe of this book, but that was pretty much about it. Full Review.

Frankly My Dear, I'm Dead by Livia J. Washburn, Cozy Mystery, First In Series, Grade = B-. A piece of fluffy, brain candy that got me through a bout of the stomach flu. Heroine is a newly divorced travel agent specializing in "literary tours." When she takes a group to a plantation house, recreated to look like Tara, the actor playing Rhett Butler turns up dead in the garden. In order to save her fledgling business, heroine starts sticking her nose into the murder investigation. Cute read, typical cozy fare. A good, solid library read - and I'll probably try the next book in the series. No "official" review.