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Sunday, April 4, 2010

Random Romance Sunday: Cheese Ahoy!

The Book: The Buccaneer by Donna Fletcher

The Particulars: Historical romance, Berkley Jove, 1995, Out Of Print

The Blurb:
His shoulders were broad, and muscles that had to have been developed by years of hard labor bulged from beneath his half-opened, white linen shirt. His legs were the width of mighty oaks that stretched the black material of his breeches to the limit, demonstrating every bit of prowess his body had to offer. But it was his face that made women catch their breath. A strong jaw. Sculpted cheekbones. A dangerous smile. Handsome, much too handsome. . .

His name was Captain Lucifer. His ruthless mastery of the sea was a notorious as his wicked way with women. And Catherine Abelard was his beautiful captive. By enslaving the stepdaughter of his enemy, the infamous pirate would have his final revenge. He would punish her with his kisses and force her to surrender to his every whim, every passion, every desire. But the devilish captor became the prisoner of his own longing. For Catherine found the tenderness beneath the treachery, the beauty within the beast. . . the lover behind the legend.
Is It In Wendy's TBR?: With a cover blurb like that? Uh, no. I thought I had some other books by Donna Fletcher in my TBR, but my LibraryThing account is telling me I don't. Hmmmm.

Any Reviews?: 1995 folks. So I got nothing other than some Squeeeeee! Amazon reviews.

Anything Else?: Oh good heavens, where to begin? That back cover blurb is probably solely responsible for the fair amount of crap the romance genre (and the readers) have had to endure over the years. Mighty oaks? Seriously? Mighty-frickin-oaks? And Captain Lucifer? Seriously? Captain-frickin'-Lucifer? They even threw the "punishing kisses" nonsense in there.

That being said, this whole affair sounds like just the ticket for you Old School Pirate On The High Seas fans. Heck, I know of at least a couple of readers who would pick up this book based on the staggering amount of purple prose on the back cover blurb alone.

Not that I'm throwing stones mind you. If this were a western, I'd probably be unable to resist rescuing it from a used bookstore. Sick monkey that I am.

We all have our vices.

14 comments:

Portia Da Costa said...

Actually, it sounds kind of fantastic! V. fond of a bit of OTTness... :)

Kristie (J) said...

At this point I'd better not say that the NFL team I route for is the Tampa Bay Buccaneers based soley on my early reading days of pirate romance. I've never told sons WHY I cheer for this team - they mock me enough as it is!
That said, I haven't read this book though.

Leslie said...

Anytime the words "might oaks" is used to refer to a portion of the hero's anatomy, it makes me nervous.

@Kristie ~ perfectly logically reason to cheer for a team. :)

A Library Girl said...

I love this blurb, it made me laugh. I think I might need to save this post for any time I need a good laugh, but I'm sure there will be other Sundays just as good.

I gotta wonder, how can this guy move without ripping his clothes, seeing as how he's so powerfully muscled his clothes are strained and can't even close properly (or so I assume from the half-open shirt ;o)), even when he's not moving?

BevBB said...

It's odd. I think I have this book. I'll have to check. I like Fletcher. Not absolutely love, mind you, but her later historicals are definitely high on my check out list.

Having said all that, one of her older Westerns, Tame My Wild Touch, is still on my top ten all time favorites. (http://bevsbooks.com/notes/?p=389)

Not so bad cover and all. (http://www.fantasticfiction.co.uk/f/donna-fletcher/tame-my-wild-touch.htm) Well, I've seen worse. ;-)

LibraryMaven said...

This is got to enter my top ten list of most hilariously awful blubs for romance novels. Second the speculation by Library Girl about how he can walk around with his "mighty oaks" straining his pants. HUMMMMM!

Forgive me, I just went off into a fantasy where his pants didn't stand the strain. Sigh. I think that is kind of like guys wanting to watch two women fight cause they hope clothing will be ripped.

Mighty fine looking man on the cover though. Wouldn't have picked this up in a used book store after the cover blurb cause pirates aren't my thing. Read a history book about pirates when I was 14 and never managed to sustain a good fantasy about them since then. Sigh. Why must real life and knowledge destroy fantasies?

Wendy said...

Portia: It sounds completely over the top!

Kristie: I half expected you to leave a comment that you owned this one! LOL

Leslie: The whole waxing poetic about the hero's physical charms on the back cover blurb made this one an ideal RSS post :)

Library Girl: Mere clothes are incapable of confining his manly manlieness! The cover blurb, the cover model, it's just SO over the top!

Bev: Oh sweet Jesus - she wrote a western?! You said the magic words. Now I need to look that one up. I am incapable of resisting Old School westerns. 'Tis sad, really.

Joy: I discovered the romance genre after the hey-day of the pirate trope, so I can sort of take 'em or leave 'em - but dang, I know SO many readers who cannot resist ship-board romances. Sort of like me with westerns :)

BevBB said...

Bev: Oh sweet Jesus - she wrote a western?! You said the magic words. Now I need to look that one up. I am incapable of resisting Old School westerns. 'Tis sad, really.

Well, I think that one qualifies at least. Sort of reminds me of Garwood's Prince Charming in terms of plot only it starts in Boston. But they do end up in one of the western territories. I was just never sure which one. And he's a gun fighter... with a ranch.

I always have thought her writing is somewhere between Krentz and Garwood, just with her own twists here and there. ;-) And even though I do like some of her newer medievals, I've always thought the relationship journey in that Western was very well done and I'm not that crazy about Westerns so that's saying something.

BevBB said...

I just wanted to add that I think I also have one by her set in San Francisco that's Victorican era. Which when you think about it, is eqivalent to the Western time frame.

And there's another one that's set in colonial Spanish California.

But, you know, Christina Dodd did the same thing because I've run across and have similar books by her. Same publisher and decade, maybe where they were trying out various voices?

JamiSings said...

Since I get seasick I can take shipboard romances or leave them.

Unless it's a Love Boat marathon. Man, I love me some Love Boat.

Especially Isacc the bartender.

Despite my seasickness I have always wanted to go on a cruise just because of The Love Boat.

o/` Love - so exciting and new.... o/`

(What? Everyone's already covered the stupid blurb and everything. So I'm just on a Love Boat tangent....)

Wendy said...

Bev: I couldn't resist. I requested a copy from PaperbackSwap :)

Jami: You may have just explained the popularity of Love Boat. All those women hooked on the idea of finding romance on the high seas!

Alie said...

LMAO that back cover blurb is rolling on the floor hilarious. It's so cheesy you need some crackers and a bottle of wine to read this book ;)

BevBB said...

Okay, Wendy, you got me curious, so I double-checked my shelves and I do have The Buccaneer. I think I may have actually read it or tried to read it at one point or another.

That, however, isn't why I'm coming back now. ;-) I was right in thinking she did other "westerns" at least in terms of the settings being out west somewhere. Besides Tame My Wild Touch, there's also San Francisco Surrender (told you there was a Victorian set there) and Untamed Fire (that's the one set in colonial Spanish California). All three of those are under a label/tag of Heartfire Romance. I wasn't all that crazy about the other two.

But then there's two others that you might be more interested in. One is Rebellious Bride about a sheriff's daughter and an English Lord, of all things, in the Dakota Territory. My post-it note in the front of the book says "taming of the shrew". Hmmm.

Also, there's this book, Playing Cupid, that I think is Americana. At least when I look at it I think quilts or something. The hero in that one is a newspaperman and I think she's a doctor. It's one of what I believe is a multi-author "A Town Called Harmony" series. That label ring any bells to anyone?

You know, for some strange oddd reason, I feel a Fletcher binge coming on. Western in flavor. ;-)

Wendy said...

Bev: The "Town Called Harmony" thing rings a very faint bell for me. Very faint....

You are not helping my old school historical addiction - AT ALL! LOL I'm going to have to dig some of these up. There's a great UBS near me that is a treasure trove of Old School goodness.....

Alie: Solely the reason I chose this one for a RRS. The cover blurb was just SO over-the-top!