Thursday, July 9, 2015

Still Fabulous After All These Years


Top Ten Signs I Know I'm Now 40 
Happy frickin' Birthday*

1) The "oldies" station is playing Top 40 hits from the 1980s.

2) My wardrobe consists of professional work attire,  yoga pants, and ratty T-shirts.  Bar-hopping, going-out clothes?  Why would I possibly need those?

3) I drink a vodka/cranberry and wince.  How did I drink these when I was 21?  HOW?!?!?!?!

4) Sleeping in until 9AM is totally self-indulgent and I'm a complete slug who has wasted the entire day.

5) Can someone explain to me what MTV and VH1 are supposed to be now?  No, really.  I don't understand.

6) A gaze longingly at my current Detroit Tigers boyfriend, Jose Iglesias and I realize I am now officially a dirty old woman.  Or a desperate cougar. 

7) Mammograms. I now need to worry about mammograms.  Note to self: Call doctor.

8) I don't immediately grasp all new technology like a duck to water.  I figure in another couple of years I'll have totally morphed into my mom.

9) People I went to high school with are now grandparents. Shoot. Me. Now.

10) I go shopping and see horrible fashion trends making a comeback.  Kids, listen to your Auntie Wendy.  Jelly shoes and neon colors were a bad idea back in my day, and guess what?  They're still a bad idea now.  Run!  Save yourselves!

* No, really.  I'm OK with the fact that today is my birthday and I've hit the big 4-0.  I wouldn't say I'm "upset" about it.  More like confused.  I mean, how did this happen?  How could I possibly be 40?  Wasn't I in college, like, last week? 

18 comments:

azteclady said...

*clears throat and prepares to sing*

*thinks of all the poor dogs in the neighborhood that will start howling and desists*

I hope you have a good b-day, regardless of how many you celebrate. Besides, didn't you know that fifty is the new thirty? The means, you just turned 20! Only, a lot wiser and with much better taste in men, books, clothes and drinks than the first time around.

Here's to you, kid!

Elisabeth Lane said...

Happy birthday!

This whole post made me chuckle. Though I have to take exception to your assessment of neon. Hot pink still turns my head every time. Jelly shoes though--an abomination for sure.

Lori said...

Happy Birthday, Wendy! I hope your day, and the year the follows, are terrific.

Rebe said...

Happy, happy birthday! I'll be turning the big 4-0 later this year, and I cannot understand the return of horrible 80s fashions, like floral jeans. Whyyyyy??? It seems so wrong.

Unknown said...

Wishing you the best for this milestone year! May you remain young at heart while continuing to seek wisdom. There's nothing wrong with owning sensible clothing. It just shows you are fiscally responsible.

I'm with Elisabeth on neon and don't mind jelly shoes. Don't love 'em, wouldn't wear them, but don't hate them.

Looking forward to meeting up with you at RWA on the 22nd.

-lawless523

Miss Bates said...

Happiest of birthdays and myriad returns of the day! May your b-day and all your days thereafter be full of health, happiness, love and cake, and supremely good reads! I was magnificent at 40 and so ARE YOU!!!!

Tracy Smith said...

I am 42. I laughed at every one of the things on your list. I remember being shocked when I realized the oldies station was playing '80s music. LOL

I remember when neon-except we called it fluorescent - came back in style a few years ago. I walked into Target, stopped and said, "I think I just flashed back to the '80s" the woman coming in behind me (who was about my age) laughed along with me.

Phyl said...

Happy birthday, Wendy! I hope the day has been special (even if you did have to go to work). Best wishes for the year ahead.

Janga said...

Happy Birthday, Wendy!

Forty is just the beginning of the how-did-I-get-here feeling. My 82-year-old aunt said to me last year, "I don't know how I got to be this old. In my head I'm still 25." As one well past her fortieth birthday, I offer this bit from Madeleine L'Engle as consolation: "The great thing about getting older is that you don't lose all the other ages you've been."

Nikki said...

Happy Belated Birthday! I hope you had a wonderful day! Looking down at 40 from afar, I can tell you that's a pretty good time.

cleo reader said...

Happy Birthday Wendy! I'm 45 and I relate to most of your list - although I kind of like seeing young people in 80s-ish fashions because at least I understand what I'm looking at.

And what is going on in that cover?!! Is that a bear on the couch?

christynawrites said...

Love, love this post, Wendy!

Bona Caballero said...

Happy birthday to you! Have a nice day and enjoy yourself.

Kelly Campbell said...

Welcome to my world. Sadly, I am way closer to 50 than 40. And 50 is 50, 40 is 40, etc. @@ So sick of people trying to make an age less than what it actually is. I was always told age is just a number, so why try to be something you're not? :( I will applaud the day I hear 21 is the new 40. ;-) And finally, to quote Bowling for Soup, "When did Motley Crue become classic rock?"

LynnD said...

Happy belated birthday Wendy. I will be turning 50 this year and I have to say, I thoroughly enjoyed my 40s - I realized that I really didn't have to "prove" anything to anyone anymore and I could just have fun. Enjoy your new decade!

I'm with you on the neon everything and jelly shoes!

Lynn Spencer said...

Happy birthday, Wendy! I hit the big milestone this year, too. And yes, the idea that people our age could be grandparents still blows my mind.

Can't wait to see you in NYC!

Wendy said...

Once again, late responding to comments. Oh Wendy, never change.

Thank you for all the nice birthday wishes! I spent it at work (and it was a pretty hectic work day at that!), but was able to soak up some fun this weekend.

As for the book cover on this post (re: Cleo) - I just noticed the heroine is holding a smoldering cigarette. Maybe all she wants for her 40th birthday is to burn that hideous couch down to a pile of ash?

Elisabeth Hobbes said...

Just found this. Happy belated birthday. I turned 40 on July 8th and I'm surviving so far, though my knees ache more!