Friday, January 16, 2009

The Super Librarian Guide To The NFL Playoffs

Yes gentle Bat Cave readers, we're in for exciting times this weekend. The AFC and NFC Championship Games are here. For you non-American-football types, basically which ever two team prevail this weekend are the teams that will meet in the upcoming Super Bowl. Which everybody in America watches, even if they only do so for the commercials. But never fear, Super Librarian is here to give you the rundown on this weekend's games, and to help you decide who you should root for.

AFC Championship Game - Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Baltimore Ravens

Why You Should Root For The Steelers: Probably the best team in the AFC. Great defense, their running back is healthy again, and you can't underestimate the hypnotic effect of Troy Polamalu's hair. Also, despite the fact their quarterback is the kind of idiot who rides a motorcycle without a helmet Big Ben didn't go to no flashy college like USC or Florida. No, he came out of Miami....of Ohio! Representing the MAC Conference. Gotta love that.

Why You Should Root For The Ravens: The kind of defense that will punch you in the face and send you cryin' home to your mama. These guys are tough. Ray Lewis is the guy everybody knows, but watch out for freak of nature safety Ed Reed. If Big Ben has a bad day, Ed is gonna make him pay. Also, their rookie (yes, rookie!) quarterback is one of the feel good stories of the year.

Who I Think Will Win: Well it should be the Steelers. They're better rested, healthier, and Ben has been in these types of pressure games before (they won the Super Bowl a couple of years back). But seriously? With that Raven's defense and how pumped up they'll be for the game? Anything could happen.

NFC Championship Game - Philadelphia Eagles vs. Arizona Cardinals

Why You Should Root For The Eagles: Eagles "fans" are a diehard lot, but they'd boo their own grandmothers off the field. Basically you should root for the Eagles because of their quarterback Donovan McNabb. Here's a guy with a colorful NFL career. Some of his problems have been his own making (Not knowing the overtime rules? Seriously?), but most of them have not (Rush Limbaugh being a blow-hard ignorant jackass, getting boo'ed at the draft!, Terrell Owens being Douchey McDouche). I want Donovan to play well. I want him to kick ass and give the finger to every fan who has ever boo'ed him and every reporter that's ever given him shit. Because Donovan is amazingly talented. Seriously Philly fans, take one of my crap Buffalo Bills quarterbacks and give me Donovan. Then you'd have something to boo about!

Oh and his wife just gave birth to twins.

Also their defense kicks ass. It's gonna be a rough day for Arizona. Plus it will really piss off Terrell Owens if they make it to the Super Bowl and win. And really, who can't get behind that? T.O. getting hosed? That would even be better than when the Giants won the Super Bowl last year and Tiki Barber and Jeremy Shockey got hosed.

Why You Should Root For The Cardinals: Because Kurt Warner is their quarterback. The guy is older than dirt, is one of the true stand-up guys in the league, and has a thumb that's basically being held together by chewing gum and dental floss. But this man can still sling the ball. It's gonna be fun and gun baby! He's going to throw that ball all over the field, and watch for wide receiver Larry Fitzgerald to make catches that are against the laws of physics. Also if you're the type who always roots for the underdog? This is your team. Historically one of the worst teams ever in the NFL. They were just terrible for a whole lotta years, and now they're standing outside the pearly gates.

Who I Think Will Win: The Eagles. I fully expect their excellent defense to give Kurt Warner fits, and he'll have a hard time chucking the ball down the field. But honestly? Either team could win this game and I'd be totally OK with it.


Phyl said...

Excellent, excellent guide, Wendy. This Philly girl is hoping for an all-Pennsylvania Super Bowl bringing back fond memories of the late 70s when the Pirates & Phillies had a great rivalry going (yeah, I'm that old). And how cool would it be to have both the World Series & NFL titles the same year? Playoff football--it's the best.

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

Oh, Ben wears a helmet now. Although I think he's largely given up riding. And besides, it's too darn cold here to get on a bike right now!

Shannon Stacey said...

I don't have a dog in this fight, but I find it almost impossible to root against McNabb. Plus, no matter how his team's doing, he's like a one-man underdog, and I'm sucker for the underdogs.

That's probably why I'm one of maybe two Patriots fans not crying over Brady's knee. Roboteam's gone, boring domination is over, and now we can have our real football team back.

jmc said...

I live in Baltimore; I like the Ravens but would not classify myself as a team fan -- my football loyalty (to Green Bay) was established while I was in college, long before the Ravens moved to town and long after the Colts left. It seemed wrong to switch, like some sort of bandwagon or fairweather fan. Having said that, I'm rooting for the Ravens this weekend, if only because Ed Reed has been playing insanely well in the last half of the season. The NFC? Eh, since neither the Packers nor the Bears are playing, it doesn't really matter to me who wins.

Lori said...

Rock on!!! I love the playoffs!!

Bob noted that 3 out of the 4 teams in the Championship games are named after birds. He felt that was a sign that the Steelers would take it all, since they are birdless.

Amy said...

I'm almost -- almost -- afraid to root for any team because my record's suckin' this year: Ohio State, South Carolina, Clemson, Penn State, Cincinnati, Oklahoma. The only team I pulled for that won was WVU, and that was luck.

Now, having said that -- Go Steelers!

Tracy said...

My hubby's just upset that the Titans blew it! lol

Kati said...

Excellent recap, Wendy!

I have no dog in the NFC hunt, except BITTERNESS. The Redskins beat both of these teams, and beat the Eagles twice! Bitter? Moi? Oui.

I'm rooting for the Ravens. Baltimore is close to DC and I enjoy the Inner Harbor. Plus, I do love me some Ray-Ray, even if he was tried for murder at some point or another. I think the Steelers will probably win, which honestly, won't upset me tremendously.

I'd prefer that the Eagles and Cards tie and NO ONE gets to play in the Super Bowl. Ugh. I guess if I pick one, I'll go with the Eagles (much as it kills me to say so) because I do kind of like Donovan, and I think he's a class act.

But really, I hate both teams. I'm supposed to. I'm a Redskins fan. ;oP

Liza said...

I think they put it in Ben's contract that he could only ride a motercycle with a helmet. I agree that the Eagles will win. Not sure if the Ravens can pull out another big game. I'm a Titan's fan and really think we were robbed last week. Yes we made many mistakes, but please, a 10 year old can see when 0 seconds are on the play clock and the ball hasn't been snapped.

Cathy in AK said...

Great analysis, Wendy.

My Giants lost to the Eagles last week, and the rivalry is too deeply seated for me to root for them. Though the idea of making T.O. cry is appealing.... I'll have to go with Arizona on principle.

As for the AFC, man, that's a toughie. I like both teams, but I think Polamalu's hair may give the Steelers the edge.

Kris Kennedy said...

Yay, Wendy! Go Iggles!

Donovan is a misunderstood and under-appreciated soul in Philly.

Sorry, Kati about the PHL-WA losses. I mean...wins. :) But I do understand hating another team just for the sake of it. Hey, I'm from Philly.

Altho... I'll admit, there's something alluring about your tie notion, and thus no Superbowl moment . . . What would they do with all the ads? The ad *money*?

Feed the poor? Reduce the national deficit? Bail our Borders?

It's so intriguing.

(You see the thing that finally lured me to comment? Not Tessa Dare's new book, not a book at all, in fact. A football team. A generally losing one, for that matter.)


Gigi said...

Great article with a great deal of insight into the teams! I am hoping for Arizona to win as they have really come on this year. But as you say it could go either way! Glad to find another librarian who loves romance AND football!emite

Wendy said...

So, is everybody ready for some football today?! Weeeeee!

Liz V. said...

Steelers all the way! Although, I'm eating way too much junk food and it's not even halftime. Eagles are getting demolished.

Wendy said...

What the heck happened to the Eagles defense in the first half? And Donovan ::shaking head:: - he'll be lucky if he doesn't get pelted with eggs when his plane lands back in Philadelphia.

Liz: I did pretty good with staying away from the junk food - but it helps tremendously that I haven't been keeping any in my house :)

Rosie said...

GG and Beanie have made up their play off picks for the last 3 years and have a standing $5 bet. GG wins again this year and it about killed him to root for the Steelers, but when the alternative is Baltimore, the Ravens, owned by that slime Modell, well you can see who he had to pick.

Beanie, was so bummed about Philadelphia. The Eagles are one of his fave teams after the TB Buccaneers. He's in a tizzy over the coaching debacle at TB.