Thursday, May 17, 2007

Oh Michigan, My Michigan

Thirteen Things That Make Michigan Great And Wendy Homesick
(by way of explanation, I'm originally from MI and only live in California for the beautiful weather, movie star governors, picturesque wildfires, earthquakes, ocean breezes, and good jobs. Yeah, it's all about the job)

1) Mackinac Island Fudge Ice Cream - Mackinac Island is an island (well duh) in northern MI and the state's tourist trap. Hopeless romantics will know the island from the cheesy Jane Seymour/Christopher Reeve movie Somewhere In Time. It's quaint. It's lovely. There are no cars allowed on the island and they have the best damn fudge in the world. Someone decided to take that fudge and put it in ice cream and so was born what is commonly referred to as Wendy Crack. I used to mainline this stuff in high school, even eating it for breakfast - because ice cream is the breakfast of champions. Unfortunately it's not available outside the state of MI, which is probably a good thing because I no longer have the metabolism of a hummingbird.

2) Meijer - Oh how I miss Meijer (pronounced My-Er). It's like a Super WalMart without all the pesky labor violation allegations. If you can't find it at Meijer, you can't find it anywhere. Buy a gallon of milk, spark plugs, new underwear, and the latest Harlequin all in one place.

3) Ted Nugent - The Motor City Madman, Uncle Ted and the poet laureate of Michigan. "I make the pussy purr with the stroke of my hand; They know they gettin' it from me; They know just where to go when they need their lovin man;they know I do it for free" Oh good times! Would you believe my younger sister refused to use these highly romantic lyrics from Cat Scratch Fever in her wedding vows?! That girl always lacked good taste.

4) My family - Awwwwwww.

5) Cute kids - My older sister's kids. Look at how cute the little wieners are (click on picture to enlarge and get full cuteness overload)

6) Hot chicks - This one is for The Boyfriend. Now you'd think living in southern California that it would be "hot chick" overload but The Boyfriend loves Midwestern girls. Adores them to bits. And hey, Playboy has more than once declared the girls of the Big Ten the hottest college girls - and who are we to argue with Playboy?

7) Bell's Beer - This is a local brewery in Kalamazoo (I got a gal...), and they have this kick ass summer brew called Oberon. It's like beer on crack. Nothing finer than sitting in the backyard on a humid day, firing up the grill, and downing the Oberons until your eyes cross. They need to start distributing to California. Like yesterday.

8) Aretha Franklin - The Queen Of Soul has lived in Michigan for many years. We adore her.

9) Motown - Easily some of the best music ever recorded. I tend to prefer the male acts myself - Marvin Gaye, The Temptations, Stevie Wonder,The Four Tops etc. Frankly, I just don't think it was the same once Berry Gordy got a bee up his butt and moved the whole operation to Los Angeles. Yeah, we got the Jackson 5 out of the deal - but maybe Michael wouldn't have gone so crazy if they had stayed in the Midwest. Just saying.

10) Da U.P. eh! - The Upper Peninsula. That strip of land that sits between Canada and Lake Superior. It's lovely up there. Lots of trees, lots of deer, and a whole lot of eccentrics. If you like scenery, it's the place to be.

11) Madonna - You can run but you cannot hide chica. Frankly she's been trying to make people forget (for years) that's she's from Bay City, but we claim her anyway. If only for the fact that she wants everyone to forget and Michiganders are just evil that way.

12) The Great Lakes - I love how Californians think they've got the monopoly on beach life. Michigan is surrounded by water, and there are hundreds of smaller lakes dotting the interior. Hey, you can't surf there, but you can certainly loll about and give yourself skin cancer all the same.

13) The Sports - Michigan is a great sports state. They have great basketball (Pistons), baseball (Tigers) and hockey (Red Wings) teams. Of course, we also have to admit to the football (Lions) team. Oh well, you take the good with the bad.


Kristie said...

Yes, while we have to admit the Lions we have Michigan football to watch and cheer for! Plus the Tigers Wings and Pistons all doing great right now kinda make up for it!

Rosie said...

At the beginning of the school year my youngest had to choose a college or university to do a report on. He chose Michigan and was seriously thinking about moving because he says he likes snow and the cold. So speaks the kid who has only ever lived in So Cal.

Kristie said...

As one who lives about a half hour away from U of Michigan, I will happily switch spots with him! I HATE this weather... it gets real old real fast. I don't need 4 seasons... and hate the snow!

Wendy said...

He likes snow - in theory. I'm the same way. I love to watch it falling. I love how everything looks white and clean after a good snow fall. I don't like the freezing temperatures, ice, shoveling it, driving in it and the piles of icky black snow that sit in parking lots until April.

So yeah, snow is great in theory :)

Kristie: The only season I miss is autumn. California doesn't have an autumn. And I don't care what anyone says - it's not normal for it to hit 100 degrees in October!

Rosie said...

Shmoo wanted me to clarify that he was thinking about being a Spartan NOT a Wolverine. Also, he's decided pretty much that he wants to be a paramedic and plans to stay in California. At least that's the plan today. He doesn't graduate until next June who knows what he'll decide by then.

Kristie said...

Boo on the Spartans! We are a Wolverine family here... and don't cheer very often for State!

Lil Sis said...

Wendy - how did you ignore the schools? Michigan Tech, Lake Superior State, Michigan State (my alma mater), ugh, and Michigan...

Wendy said...

Lil Sis: I know. I probably should have included the colleges. But hey, I only was able to list 13 and what was I supposed to do? Leave off Mackinac Island Fudge Ice Cream? I think not!