Fixing The RITA

There's another dust-up brewing online over the RITA judging, the most interesting being Jamie Sobrato receiving a comment that her Blaze novel had "no strong romantic elements." Basically it wasn't a romance. Intriguing since last time I checked, Harlequin required books in the Blaze line to be romances. But what do I know?

Now I'm not very well read in the Blaze line, but I find it hard to believe that they all suck so bad that not one was capable finaling in the RITA the last couple of years. Which begs the question is the RITA process broken?

Personally, I think broken is the wrong word. More like flawed.

I used to pay attention the RITA. Now though, with so many authors online and blogging, the "process" of how a book wins a RITA has been demystified for readers. Frankly, an award where the author has to enter their work (plus pay a fee) in order to "win" doesn't mean much. What about those authors who choose not to enter (for whatever reason)? Am I to believe that their books are somehow inferior? No. Because I've read many awesome books that never finaled. Why didn't they final? I don't know because RWA never publishes a list of all the books that were entered to begin with. So maybe that super-fantastic book I gushed about for a solid month wasn't even entered. Maybe the author is saving her money to buy groceries or pay her electric bill. Maybe the author isn't a member of RWA and could care less. Who knows?

Being Queen Librarian Of The Universe, here is how I'd "fix" the RITA process.

• Add a romantica/erotica category. Just do it already.

• Drop the peer-judging who-ha. Open up judging to librarians, booksellers, editors and reviewers.

• Publish a list of all the books that were entered for consideration. Then we can see for ourselves if there is inequality in the judging process. Frankly I like facts to back up my various incoherent rants.
  

But nobody is asking me. Typical.

This of course also returns to my recent RTB column where I stated:

Awards - in the grand scheme of things, most readers could care less. That said, some libraries will probably decide to buy your book now.

And I believe that's very, very true. Most readers don't care. I suspect authors care because it somehow "validates" their work. It's a pat on the back. It's the industry telling you that they like you! They really, really like you!

My advice? Write the best books you can. Please your readers. That's the only audience an author needs "approval" from. And if you please readers, the word of mouth will very likely do more for your sales then some dopey gold statue could. Then you can laugh all the way to the bank. How cool would that be?

Easier said then done I suppose, but still good advice. Well, at least I think it's good advice. But again, what do I know?

Public Service Announcement

I was trolling through a database this morning looking for upcoming bestsellers for August and September, and stumbled across these three:

An Unexpected Song by Iris Johansen
The Last White Knight by Tami Hoag
Golden Threads by Kay Hooper

All are due out in early August 2006 and all are hardcovers retailing for $15.00

Wait a moment, my spidey sense is tingling.

Further investigation confirms what I already was beginning to suspect. Yep, these are all reprints of Bantam Loveswept categories (#438, #561 & #348 respectively).

I always like to detail to non-romance readers how many Big Name Authors got their start writing in category. While Harlequin's poster girl is La Nora (they got Tess Gerritsen too), I find Bantam's former stable slightly more impressive with not only Johansen, Hoag, and Hooper - but Sandra Brown as well. Someone over there had an eye for talent. Or at least an eye for authors who had the potential to Make It Big.

I'm of two minds on these hardcover reprints. Part of me sees them as a shameless money grab on the part of the publisher. A chance to dupe readers who enjoy their newer suspense work into buying a romance that probably has not stood the test of time.

On the other hand, the librarian in me revels in the fact that these long out of print books are now is a friendly library-lending format. Hey, I love paperbacks but in the library world they are a pain in the ass.

Which means, I'll buy multiple copies of these reprints. But I'm thinking I might warn the librarians about them in advance. Golden Rule #1 for readers? Check the copyright date.

Observing From The Sidelines

So I just finished Lover Eternal by J.R. Ward. I know, I cannot believe it either. I am finally free of this book!

My final verdict? Average. For me the parts never added up to a cohesive, satisfying total. I liked some aspects, and rolled my eyes over a lot of stuff. Basically it all came out in the wash.

Things I liked? The atmosphere in general. There was a nice gothic, comic book edge to it. I also liked Rhage's utter devotion to Mary once they "bonded." Lord help me, I liked Zsadist - which means even I have fangirl tendencies. I liked Bella.

What I didn't like? The dopey ass names. Seriously, are these guys like the paranormal romance version of the Village People? The dopey ass dialouge. Who the hell says "you feel me?" all the time? The heroine who takes forever to catch on. Seriously when the hero calls women "females" and is caught staring through her sliding glass door at 4AM you think she would have gotten a clue that the guy isn't normal. A heroine who is rather bland. She just doesn't hold water next to all the Alpha vampire testerone that's flying around. The hero needed someone with real fire and instead the author gives him a wet match. Blah.

Oh and how stupid is the Scribe Virgin thing? Seriously.

This book and series reminds me of a recent RTB column I did on "hero-squealers" vs. "heroine-squealers." The Ward series is built for fangirls because it's All About The Heroes. The heroines (if they read like Mary!) are more like an afterthought. The heroes are the real show, the heroines are wallpaper. For me, that isn't a romance. Heck, it ain't even that interesting.

Which is probably why I wasn't madly enthralled with this book. Like I said, average.

Going Out With A Bang

In what is sure to be seen as a metaphor for my tenure as a library branch manager, tonight I had to unclog an overflowing toilet in the public women's restroom.

Oh, and it also meant I had to mop the floor.

Makes me so glad that I've been paying off my college student loans for the last seven years. All that valuable, indispensable education so I could dig out a plunger from the janitor's closet and get to work.

And not to toot my own horn - but I'm a master toilet plunger. Years of living in apartments with outdated plumbing and you quickly become an expert.

In other news - May 1 is the official date. That's the day I hand over my keys to The New Guy and go back to working one job. One blissfully boring job.

The Saga Continues

Hey, only 200 more pages of Lover Eternal by J.R. Ward to go - and I have to say I hit The Plot Point. Yes, the one that everyone has been debating about.

Spoilers are coming, so consider this your warning.

So the hero goes out and gets laid after playing reindeer games with the heroine. This has sparked much debate in Blogland about cheating heroes. So where do I fall?

The book actually got better for me after that moment. Color me contrary.

Why? Frankly Mary and Rhage aren't anywhere near The Great American Love Story, so that's probably why it didn't bother me. The whole thing is reading very much like love at first sight and "soul mates." Two plot devices that I'm notoriously finicky about anyway.

I think if Rhage and Mary had bared their souls to one another the whole Rhage-boinking-another-chickie episode would have bothered me. But since the romance has been written with an instantaneous feel? Didn't bother me. Also the author keeps the actual sex act off page, a wise decision on her part me thinks.

So how did the book get better after the cheating? Chapter 28. Rhage feels like scum for boinking the other chickie and Mary is upset and angry. Thus we get an Angry Sex Scene. God, I love Angry Sex Scenes. There needs to be a lot more of them in Romance Novel Land as far as I'm concerned. Oh sure, sex is supposed to be about love, flowers, rainbows and sunshine - but admit it. C'mon admit it to yourself. Sex isn't always about love. And if it were always about love it would get kinda boring.

Just callin' it like I see it.

To me Chapter 28 finally brought more development to the characters. They finally got interesting. Up until then I was rather bored by the whole affair. Sure the atmosphere is good, but the male characters are all dark, brooding and scarred and Mary is giving off the Damsel In Distress stink. Chapter 28 shows me another dimension.

We'll see how it ends. Right now, still in average territory.

Suicide Hotline

We just watched the movie Crash on cable. Now I want to slit my wrists.

In reading news - past page 100 of Lover Eternal. The hero is a stalker, the heroine has cancer and all the macho guys say bizarre things like "my brother" all the time. And how come these guys are vampires, but I'm a quarter of the way through the book and there hasn't been any blood-sucking? Does that strike anyone else as a bit odd? And Mary is so going to turn into one of those heroines who needs to "protected" and "cherished" all the time. Seriously, I can just tell already. Puke.

Where's that razor blade....

Stranded

The Boyfriend's car is in the shop. Which means he has taken my car to work. Which means I'm stuck at home today (yes, I have a day off).

Normally this is a very good thing. I can read, watch Law & Order reruns, and generally wallow. Except my aparment looks like a tonardo hit it. Which means I probably should be cleaning instead of infusing myself with caffeine and typing this blog entry.

Bah!

In other news - my latest column is up over at Romancing The Blog. I actually wrote this blog a couple of weeks ago before my brain began to melt. That was quite insightful on my part since if I had to come up with a RTB blog topic right now I think it would short circuit what brain cells I have left functioning. So go forth and comment!

I try to skew my RTB columns towards a reader's perspective because 1) I'm not an author and 2) Not big on reading author/related posts about "craft." Still, it's hard. Especially when I seem to be hating every book I read these days.

On that subject - I'm starting to get into Lover Eternal more now that I'm around page 100. Still, a hero possessed by evil who must have oodles of meaningless sex to starve off the darkness?! Didn't I already suffer through this plot device once for a review book? Somehow it hasn't gotten any less insulting since then either. Right now - LE is firmly sitting in average territory. Let's see where it goes from here shall we?

Happy Food

My entire family has issues with food. Oh sure, they'll probably all end up reading this, deny it, and then be ticked at me for airing it out publicly - but dang, y'all know it's true!

Yesterday I admitted that I have hysterical-crying-when-stressed-out-syndrome, today it is emotional eating.

Or in the immortal words of Stephanie Plum: Happy Food.

I'd stopped in at Tasty Pastry and left with a day old birthday cake. The cake said Happy Birthday Larry. I don't know how Larry celebrated his birthday, but apparently it was without cake. Larry's loss was my gain. If you want to get happy, birthday cake is the way to go. This was a yellow cake with thick, disgusting, white frosting made with lard and artificial butter and artificial vanilla and a truck load of sugar. It was decorated with big gunky roses made out of pink and yellow and purple frosting. It was three layers thick with lemon cream between the layers. And it was designed to serve eight people, so it was just the right size. --Eleven On Top by Janet Evanovich

Sometimes a girl just needs happy food. I love The Boyfriend, and he does his best. He tries to make me laugh. He's supportive. But he isn't Happy Food.

Happy Food is cake. Any cake - I'm not picky. Donuts. Warm, gooey chocolate chip cookies fresh from the oven (this is assuming I didn't eat all the raw cookie dough) and my favorite - breakfast. I'm talking real breakfast here. Pancakes. Waffles. Sausage. Bacon. ::drooling::

Which means I must go to the IHOP for lunch. Healthy? Um, probably not. But everyone knows that Happy Food is calorie free. It's a scientific fact folks. I'm pretty sure researchers at MIT conducted the ground-breaking study.

Brain Melt

I know you'll all find this hard to believe, but I just had a meltdown here at work. The only reason I can still hold my head marginally high is that I didn't dissolve into a giant puddle of tears. A bloody miracle since I inherited hystiercal-crying-when-stressed-out-syndrome from my mother - but still it wasn't pretty.

But Wendy, you say, they've hired your replacement at the library. Happy, happy, joy joy! Right?

Wrong. I don't know when the heck he's starting. Which means I'm still in Two Job Hell.

I have had enough. Enough to the point where my boss said, "How about May 1?" Which I replied, "May 1 is fine, but even if he doesn't start that date I'm done."

And I am.

I almost strangled The Boyfriend last night when he mentioned that the living room carpet really needed to be vacuumed. I am not a pleasant girl to live with at the moment.

And in other news, I am so not into Lover Eternal it's not even funny - but it's for review so I must slog on. I did end up succumbing to the temptation of Party Princess by Meg Cabot and knocked it off in 24 hours. Good, but not up to snuff with the other books in the series. I felt the conflict was a bit on the weak side this go around. Still, a comfort read and it helps me channel my inner-teenage girl. Which now that I think about it - probably isn't a good thing right about now.

Calgon Take Me Away!

Well the good news is they hired a new manager for the library. The bad news? I have no bloody clue when his start date is. In the meantime, when I'm not working my other job, I have to continue to oversee a building that is determined to kill me. Hey, Stephen King had the killer car, Christine. I can have a killer building.

I had to phone in two more work orders yesterday, bringing my total up to 5.

• Vandalized front windows with etched gang "tags" in glass
• Graffiti tagged on my back staff entrance door
• A leaky roof that rains on top of my reference desk
• A keyboard shelf that needs to be moved on my reference desk
• And my favorite - someone had an "accident" on one of our lounge chairs

Is it any wonder I'm not reading jack right now. Only 26 pages into Lover Eternal by J.R. Ward and I'm trying not to get distracted by the shiny new copy of Party Princess by Meg Cabot that just showed up on my desk.

Snoopy Dance

Just got word - they've hired my replacement at the library (The Old Job). No word yet on when his start date will be, but the end is in sight!

Another Reason To Diet

After a long engagement (they planned it that way!), it looks like my younger sister is going to walk down the aisle with her geek-in-shining-armor around Christmas. This means a couple of things for Wendy:

• Pay off credit card debt so I can buy her a fabulous gift
• Pay off credit card debt so I can buy plane tickets
• Pay off credit card debt so I can buy a new dress
• Good God I need to get serious about exercising

Thankfully we bought The Boyfriend two new suits this weekend for work - so he's covered. Literally.

In reading news - shoot me. Seriously, death would be less painful. I finished Defiant by Bobbi Smith this afternoon. Frankly, it's too painful to rehash here. Maybe I'll just be lazy and post a link to my TRR review when it goes up. For those who can't wait, here's the quick and dirty version:

• Poorly written (all tell, no show and tons of head-hopping)
• A heroine who goes from innocent, giggly girl to wanton flirt in the blink of an eye
• A mystery angle that any idiot can solve by page 45
• Purple prose in the extreme. The word "hungrily" was used so much I began to suspect the heroine and hero of cannibalism

Like I said painful. Next up, time for me to stop avoiding Lover Eternal by J.R. Ward. I'm still scared....

Rinse And Repeat

I've finally had time to go through the May issue of Romantic Times, which yielded only one surprise - I added two Silhouette Desires to my wish list (Kristi Gold, who is finally laying off the sheikhs, and Merline Lovelace respectively). Once my favorite series line, I've all but given up on them thanks to invading hordes of sheikhs and continuing series. Other than that? Another month with very few historicals of interest (for me at least) hitting the shelves.

(I know this is a repetitive whine for regular visitors but bear with me)

I love keeping a running wishlist, which is a tad obsessive compulsive, but I've never been one for impulse buying when it comes to fiction. I like having a shopping list of potential titles, and use Microsoft Access to keep it organized into sub genres. Right now this is how my numbers are stacking up:

• Contemporary Romance (including Romantic Suspense) - 70
• Erotica (books marketed specifically as such) - 28
• Harlequin/silhouette series - 59
• Historicals - 32 (sob)
• Mystery - 12
  

Let those numbers speak for themselves. Trends to come? I suspect my erotica shopping list will soon overtake my historicals list. Especially when it appears that Black Lace will soon become more of a mainstream presence here on American shores (see page 20 of the May Romantic Times).

And while we're on the subject of the steamy stuff - I'm looking for opinions on Sarah McCarty's Promises series from Ellora's Cave. They're historical westerns (yippee!) and are now available in print (double yippee!), so I'm looking to add them to the shopping list.

In reading news - I just couldn't bring myself to start Lover Eternal by J.R. Ward. I'll get to it, but my mood (and general surliness) made me go for the "easy" read first - the new Bobbi Smith novel, Defiant.

So far this is the sort of book you can read with half a brain cell. The writing style leaves a lot to be desired (all tell, no show), with lots of head-hopping which has led to me feeling disconnected from the characters. That said, it's an easy read, and I suspect I could whip through it in one sitting if I didn't have this pesky job. OK, two jobs. But I'm not bitter.

What Goes Up?

Me: The Tigers are 3-0!

The Boyfriend: Uh, Wendy...

Me: Oh sure, we played Kansas Shitty first but,

TB: Uh, Wendy....

Me: But we rocked the hell out of the Rangers!

TB: Uh Wendy....

Me: Pudge seems to have found his swing, Monroe should really blossom this year, Ordonez and Shelton are real threats I think....

TB: Uh Wendy...

Me: What dear?

TB: You're drinking the Kool-Aid.

Me: I am not drinking the Kool-Aid!

TB: Sigh, yes you are.

Me: Ok, I might have taken a sip.....

Mountain O' Books & Series-itis

You might have noticed from my sidebar that I have 4 books going at the moment. A rarity for me, but the non-fiction titles sounded so interesting that I requested them from work and am mainly skimming through them.

I'm also starting Lover Eternal by J.R. Ward, which I just received for review.

Can I just say I'm scared?

Besides the fact that my last batch of review books were dreadful (D, C-, D and B respectively), Lover Eternal is long. OK, so I think any book over 400 pages is long - but this one has a damn glossary of terms in the front. Which says three things to this reader:

• Lots O' World Building
• Danger, Danger - series ahead!
• Potential fangirl hazard!

Seriously, if I don't like this book will some of you be showing up on my doorstep brandishing medeival torture devices?

All I can say is it better stand alone or it doesn't have a prayer.

Lots of grumblings online recently about the proliferation of series in Romance Novel Land. I like to think I have a unique perspective on this, as I haven't been reading romance "all my reading life," and I love series - just not in the romance genre.

In the romance genre I have two series in my keeper stash. Lorraine Heath's excellent Texas trilogy (she needs to leave England - seriously y'all) and The Rock Creek Six series by Lori Handeland and Linda Devlin. Notice anything? Both of these series had defined endings. Heath's was a trilogy and the Rock Creek Six were about six men - hence six books. Finished. Done.

Now I love mystery series. Cannot get enough. In fact, there are a couple of series I read that I should probably stop reading. Instead, I stop buying and borrow a library copy. I enjoy watching the same protagonist over the course of many books change and grow. You can't do that in romance. For one thing you need a happily ever after. No HEA? It ain't romance. And following the same couple over several books? That's a saga. Two totally different genres. For instance, JD Robb would be writing a saga if she dropped the mystery from her books.

So where do romance series lose me? Here we go:

They Try To Hard - Sooner or later you run out of characters, and then the author/publisher tries to milk every dollar. No more siblings? OK, write about their children, grandchildren, former school chum, the butler downstairs, the bitchy next door neighbor.....

It gets more than a bit absurd after a while.

Series-itis - You do not need to have every previous couple show up in the latest book. If they don't do a darn thing to further the current story, they're just annoying and taking up space. Besides, I'm not reading Book 21 to find out about the couple from Book 6. I'm reading Book 21 to read about the Book 21 couple!

Give Me A Damn Ending - Mystery authors have known for years that you can tie up loose ends and still have readers coming back for the next installment. Why romance authors fail at this so miserably I'll never know. Don't leave huge chunks of the plot unanswered! You're essentially manipulating the reader. "Ha ha ha! Want to know if the pyscho killer gets caught? You have to read my next book that will be out in April 2007!" Seriously, nothing yanks my chain faster or harder. I will harp on this to my dying day. And authors - if you do something like this? Pray that I don't get assigned your book for review. I'll call you to the mat. I'm not talking piddly shit. If the protagonist still has an estranged relationship with her mother - that's fine. But the pyscho killer should have been caught. Hey, he can escape from prison in the next book - but his identity should be revealed at the end of book one thankyouverymuch.

Honestly it all comes down to character-driven stories. Series that are character driven (which I think most mystery series are!), keep the reader engaged. If they like the character, they come back for more. Romance series cannot be about the same character because then it wouldn't be a romance (ah, that pesky HEA). So the author relies on plot devices, external conflict, and has to introduce other characters that will keep the series going. Ultimately, these other characters tend to take up too much space, and the romance you want to read about suffers considerably.

But that's just the way I see it. In the meantime, I read the books that sound good to me - series or not. They just better stand alone.

Play Time

I finished 4 books during the month of March. That's so depressing I'm thinking of jumping off the nearest roof. By comparison - I read 10 books in February. Puny, teeny-tiny February.

What went wrong? I hit on a terrible batch of review books. Dreadful. Dreadful enough that I was beginning to question why I keep doing that job for free. Heck, I should at least start taking bribes to combat the pain and emotional suffering.

Hitting a skid like this is always hard, as it turns me off books entirely. I don't want to read. I start thinking about dusting my living room. I think that maybe I should clean The Boyfriend's bathroom more often (a job that requires hazard pay most of the time). So when I'm down like this I like to play with my TBR. Just because I'm a geek like that, and The Boyfriend was starting to make grumbling noises about how he couldn't close the closet door in our storage room.

I am a girl without a regular book case - so most of my books are kept in RubberMaid totes. However, I do have one hanging shelf, which The Boyfriend cheerfully hung up this weekend. He's so good - he didn't even pass out when he saw all of the books I have. I really should do another count and catalog the mass - but I'm afraid. Afraid of the books toppling on me and becoming buried alive, plus afriad that I'll actually have a number to work with. Sometimes the not-knowing is just better.

In reading news, I did finish up The Burning by Susan Squires this weekend. It very much follows the norm of her previous vampire books - slow moving, gothic and tortured characters. The romance is a little light in the pants, but Squires writes strong character studies, and gothic junkies (like myself) should enjoy the atmosphere. This series definitely fits the bill for readers who like their vampires dark, haunted and with lots o' baggage.

I'm awaiting new review books (and praying), so in the meantime I'm trying to plow through some TBR books. Rule of thumb - if it fails to engage me after 50 pages it hits the trade bag. I'm sorry, my addiction has gotten so out of control that I cannot waste my precious "non-reviewing" time on books that are meh.